Who said I was homophobic?

Are you homophobic? Is the question I ask people when they seem to damn freak out when they see two men kissing , or two girls caressing.

Down my structure, a cold chill runs. At times I ask myself the question. The answer, of course is no!

 Three days ago, I was with a friend in a pub, having a drink. Two guys came, sat next to us and started talking. After a few minutes ,we learned that they were a couple. They kissed just as two people in love would.

I went downstairs to the ladies, I saw two men doing the same thing. I thought we were mistaken in our choice of the pub. But the waiter saw this as he served us and said :”oh, damn,that’s nasty”. A prove that he is not really used to the scene.

Or still a month or so ago, these two girls in the swimming pool, not only kissing but holding themselves in a somehow embarrassing way. At least for us. This means all those who are subjected to the scene and have no choice. I did not complain, and am not going to do it now because people have the right to love. But when it is extremes,………… did they have to come to the water with us in a public swimming pool?

Just a few weeks ago, I learnt that this friend of mine was gay. I had not known him for ages, but that does not justify my failure to tell it. Right from the first time we met, things just went so cool. I loved holding his hand and walking with him, hugging him warmly and telling him that he was so lovely. Because he is.

He had this long hair that would at times drop in front of his eyes, so he would push it aside. I found this little gesture a bit girlish in some manner. But it rendered him even more cute. I used to smile every time I was with him.

The day I learnt that he was homosexual, I did not get away, no. I remained as usual but things somehow put us apart.

 We no longer meet daily as we used to. So I no longer walk around hand in hand with him. He no longer has long hair, so the girlish thing left him.

 I know he is gay and he still remains one of those people I cherish their company. He has this kind of humour a girl would appreciate. He has no shame in describing his feelings. He does not make me laugh in order to please me then try to hook up with me, no he is just natural.

However the society is, I think homophobia still lingers somewhere in the air!


Today I did my share in building the nation. I mean my nation. I have been working for my employer for almost one year now,phew!How time flies! I was not thinking of staying with this person for long, given that I would have several people to work with but mostly to please.

When I grow up, I would like to have no man, no woman employ me, this means at the age of retire, bcoz,when will I say ‘now that I have grown up…’?

My employer seems the best person one would wish to work for,never authoritative, never shifting blames and stress on me!So lovely. I have this feeling that this person has some hidden agenda, just to keep me for some queer reason. I even decided to inquire if she was paying me less than anyone in my position, but no, all was alright.

Am still trying to find a way to just chuck out of this job, I, just like everyone(or almost everyone) do not like my job,I am an ambitious person, who isn’t anyway?We all know that once you start saying that you do not like your job,its time to quit,only that people do not quit!WTF?

Today however, someone ,not a direct employer , but someone I have lots of respect for told me like the cutest words that I have not heard for long,or even never……..

“Thanks a lot for what you have been doing.You have been great, so lovely.  You have been God sent I do not know how we would have been without you, you have been such a blessing, thanks a lot!”

That’s what she told me,what a flatter!But I felt good,I must admit. So these people finally appreciate me, I have not put so much effort though but hey, am glad about this declaration,it keeps me going but come summer, I will not work,I will ONLY rest! (I already have this year’s bikini,so……..hip hip hurray!)

As for now,I will appreciate the fact that some people think am a blessing to them!

AOB: I think Obama is such a cute ass,who can deny this?No one,No one.Michelle too,yes she is a cute ass too. The kids are pretty ,I don’t wanna be vulgar.They are cute girls. I am drunk,I am under the affluence of incohol,but so what?

Am just looking out of my window,its snowing. Its beautiful. Paris never gets its share of snow anyway. So when it snows,its something to watch and acknowledge. I feel privileged for some reason. Being out here is not the best thing. I remember all the Christmas and new year festive, family including extended around, friends and neighbours at home. Those moments I dearly miss. But at the same time I want to appreciate what I have.

Someone might think it is awkward not to like Paris. I am not disliking this city. It is beautiful and stuff. Of course. But how disgusting a place is when one celebrates such religious days like Christmas over wine, champagne and good food,with friends and friends’ friends without ever mentioning why the day is being celebrated! Giving and receiving gifts from people, even the unexpected ones. Loving every gift including  that one, one hates most.

Then we drink and talk and eat and drink …….and the circle continues. Then we realize that it is 2:30 am. Those who can leave ,do so. Those want to stay or have to ,stay over. I fell in the latter. I was not willing to take a cab. I was not sure to afford. I was with this friend I had not seen for sometime. Since we did not decide whether to go to her place or mine, we decided to stay over as the others left.

The next day I was somehow tired and lost. The usual hangovers. I wake up,jump over and wonder why am where I am. Five minutes was the time I needed to get to know the answer. I opt for a huge cup of black tea.

Do I have to spend Christmas this way year in year out? Do I have to offer gifts to people who do not really matter to me in the name of “friendship”?Even if I do not particularly appreciate them? Do I have to spend a lot of time over a meal however tired or bored I could be?Do I have to fake my smiles all evening and force myself to listen to people who do not please me,or people I sincerely do not like. Do I have to do what the Romans do just because I am in Rome?

Anyway I am not really complaining or disliking what I have now. I think its a high time I learned to appreciate Paris with its glamour and beauty. Its boring Parisians who never like anyone. Its perfect transport system.

All the pretty monuments that shine in the winter nights. The splendid streets that glitter with decorations.

Then the new year is all about a nice meal(as ussual) then going out to dance the night away.All night long,dancing  and dancing and dancing, and shouting “bonne année!”(happy new year!)

The new year is here,long live Paris!

Happy new year to all!

Things happen,they really do.

A few days ago, Bush recieved a pair of shoes in his face,some journalists are tough,some people have balls!

A bomb was found(luckily before it exploded) in Paris today.

A friend broke up with the “man of her life”after a lone term relation, a four year thing is no joke……………………………….

Then we think that life is fair?No lets think twice!

Last evening as I went home,I dropped by Mc-Donalds to buy a milk shake as usual.Normally I take strawberry flavour,but yesterday was different.Apart from the fact that I love change,a friend had convinced me that the vanilla one is way too sweet.So I opted for the vanilla flavoured milkshake.

As I went there, a man walked toward me and did not even bother to make way,not for me but for the two of us to walk normally.The pavement was not so small,but I was as the side of the wall,so I could not hug the wall just for a certain monsieur to pass.He walked straight,did not bother who or what was ahead of him.At least as far as I noticed.I skived him slightly,but he hit me and went on,I was so mad.I turned and waited for him to excuse himself as we all do,you know.But no,he did not turn back.I was pissed off.

I wanted to go home straight away but this milkshake crave,I could not get over it. So I overlooked that brual man’s  thing and moved on,as usual.Worse things happen,no?If I were in Kenya,I would ask him,practically to say sorry.To excuse himself at least!I used to.In other cases,I would shout “sura mbaya wewe”(Ugly)That would calm down the macho.But last evening,I was not in Nairobi.

I bought my thing and got into a subway.I chose to stand.I always do especially when I do not have many stops.Next to me were these two young guys,hardly twenty.Yes very young.They were talking,I did not pay attention to their conversation but they were happy.They talked gaily.

As I almost finished my milkshake,there is the foam,just at the bottom,of course, it was at the top but has been descending as I drunk with the straw.There is something I like about the foam,its just a nice sensation in the mouth.

I looked down,just where this boys were seated and ,helas!saliva.He has been spitting right there.I was clearing my milkshake,I could not,the foam…..the saliva…I just felt like trowing up.I was pissed off.

Am not sure but if I was in Kenya,I would tell someone “wacha kutema ovyo ovyo” or better still “stop spitting ,its disgusting!” Of course there are no subways in Nairobi,I imagine it would be in a bus! I would not have hesitated,but I was not in Nairobi,or any Kenyan town for that matter.

When I got off, I was on the phone in a hurry to have diner.I was hungry.I passed by a café.I was on the phone,so I was not really looking ahead of me,I was concentrated on my telephone conversation. I blame it, because I walked too close to this guy. I did not see that he was holding a cigarette.As if by coincidence, just as I walked next to him he blew a curl of soot right into my face.I was pissed off.

And yes,we all say that The French are romantic.Will someone tell me how?

The paradox of things……..!